Muslimah

Question I work full-time every day, so all the money I earn I spend on clothes, shoes and cleaning materials, whilst my husband spends on rent, bills and some other things. I want to know what are the things my husband must spend on for me. For example, does he only have to clothe me if all my clothes are worn out? And my husband tells me: “If you want me to spend on you for everything, then you should stay home and not work.” Answer Praise be to Allah Firstly: In the answer to question no. 3054, we quoted sufficient evidence from the Quran and Sunnah, and scholarly consensus, to prove that it is obligatory for the husband to spend on his wife, according to his means, and that he does not have the right to make her pay for her own expenses, even if she is rich, except with her agreement. This spending on the wife’s maintenance includes everything having to do with her clothing, summer and winter. It does not mean that he has to do that every year or every season, even ...

Question If a muslim man has taken a muslim wife, and not fulfilled his obligations set forth by allah and the quran. As a result the muslim women leaves the deen, and now doesn't cover and maybe not even practicing islam anymore. My question is, what are the consciquences of their actions? Answer Praise be to Allaah. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning): “O you who believe! Ward off yourselves and your families against a Fire (Hell) whose fuel is men and stones, over which are (appointed) angels stern (and) severe, who disobey not, (from executing) the Commands they receive from Allaah, but do that which they are commanded”[al-Tahreem 66:6] It was narrated from Ibn ‘Umar that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Each of you is a shepherd and each of you is responsible for his flock. The ameer (ruler) who governs the people is a shepherd and is responsible for his flock. A man is the shepherd of the members of his household and is r...

Question A man divorced his wife irrevocably, and he has a daughter and two sons from her. She will have custody of them, and he will arrange accommodation for them, by Allah’s leave, and pay maintenance for the children. This is after coming to an amicable agreement without referring the matter to the courts, and the amount agreed upon is double what the courts would order, based on what some lawyers told us. He has two questions: is he obliged to pay for the repair of any damage to appliances and the like in the accommodation he is providing, or should the cost of repairs and maintenance for these appliances be part of the agreed-upon maintenance? He also wants to know his financial duties towards his ex-wife, and whether he is obliged to provide accommodation for her? Is there something called “ ‘iddah maintenance” , as they have asked him for something called “ ‘iddah maintenance (nafaqat al-‘iddah)”, which is different from nafaqat al-mut‘ah and al-mu’akhkhar (delayed portio...

Question I have a question concerning fasting, during the fast is it permissable to say I love u to a husband, My husband asked me to say it during fast and I said to him that it is not permissable, he said it is allowed? Answer Praise be to Allaah. There is nothing wrong with a man playing with his wife, or a wife with her husband, by saying words while fasting, on the condition that there is no danger of either of them climaxing. If there is the danger that they may reach climax, as in the case of one who has strong desires and who fears that if he plays with his wife his fast may be broken by his ejaculating, then it is not permissible for him to do that, because he is exposing his fast to the risk of being broken. The same applies if he fears that he may emit prostatic fluid (madhiy). (al-Sharh al-Mumti’, 6/390). The evidence that it is permissible to kiss and play with one’s wife, if one is sure that there is no risk of reaching climax, is the report narrated by al-Bu...

Question I left my country to live in an environment more condusive to learning about Islam, and Alhamdulillah, Allah provided me with a wonderful family who looked after me, JazahumAllahu kheyran. The father of this family took the responsibility of walayah (my family is not Muslim) - in looking for an appropriate husband for me, making arrangements for my accomodations, provision, and Islamic education. As we began to go through potential husbands, he became aware that he had most of the qualities I was looking for. He first discussed it with his wife, and then several months later opened the subject with me. However, his first wife made it clear to me that she didn't want the marriage to take place. I requested another brother to take the role of wali for me, and on his advice, and the advice of other learned people who know him and his family, and after much istikhara, the marriage took place. My question is two parts - Now, the first wife is claiming that my marriage t...

Question If the wife do not pray regularly or do not fast or violate other obligatory act, will the husband be responsible for this on the day of judgement, will he be punished for that and what is his responsibility under above situation in this world? Answer Praise be to Allaah. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning): “Men are the protectors and maintainers of women, because Allaah has made one of them to excel the other, and because they spend (to support them) from their means” [al-Nisa’ 4:34] This aayah states that the man is the guardian of the woman and is in charge of her. According to a saheeh hadeeth, the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “The man is the shepherd of the members of his household and is responsible for his flock. Each of you is a shepherd and is responsible for his flock. So the man is a shepherd and is responsible for his flock.” The most important duty of the “shepherd” is to guide his “flock” to obey the commands...

Question what are a wife's rights on her husband according the Quran and Sunnah? or what are a husbands duties to his wife and viceversa? Answer Praise be to Allaah. Islam has enjoined upon the husband duties towards his wife, and vice versa, and among these duties are some which are shared by both husband and wife.  We will mention – by the help of Allaah – some of the texts of the Qur’aan and Sunnah which have to do with the duties of the spouses towards one another, quoting also from the commentaries and views of the scholars.  Firstly:  The rights of the wife which are hers alone:  The wife has financial rights over her husband, which are the mahr (dowry), spending and accommodation.  And she has non-financial rights, such as fair division between co-wives, being treated in a decent and reasonable manner, and not being treated in a harmful way by her husband.  1.Financial rights  (a)The mahr (dowry). This is the money to w...

Question A woman has been given the choice by her husband of either going with him when he goes to study in a kaafir country, and take a course there, or of staying in the Muslim country. He is going there for some worldly benefits and to earn a higher salary. Should she go with him or not? Answer We put this question to Shaykh Muhammad ibn Saalih al-‘Uthaymeen, may Allaah preserve him, who answered as follows: “Praise be to Allaah, Lord of the Worlds, and peace and blessings of Allaah be upon our Prophet Muhammad and all his family and companions. I think that she should go with him, because this will keep him safer from temptation. There will be no sin on her so long as she adheres to her duties of covering and behaving modestly. But if he goes alone there is the fear that he may fall into temptation, and if she stays alone without a husband she will not be happy… And Allaah knows best.”

Question A woman wants to go and perform Hajj, although she has performed this obligatory duty before. Her stepdaughter will be going with her, and the husband of her stepdaughter. Is he regarded as a mahram for her, and is it permissible for her to travel with him?  There is another scenario, which is a woman who is going to travel with her son, and her (female) neighbour wants to go with them. Is that permissible, knowing that the female neighbour is not a mahram for the son of her neighbour?. Answer Praise be to Allaah. Firstly: In order for Hajj to be obligatory for a woman, she should have a mahram who can accompany her on her journey, because al-Bukhaari (1862) and Muslim (1341) narrated that Ibn ‘Abbaas (may Allaah be pleased with him) said: The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “No woman should travel except with a mahram, and no man should enter upon her unless she has a mahram with her.” A man said, “O Messenger of Allaah, I want to g...

Question I want to ask to what degree the husband’s duties towards his wife’s family extend. My question is because I am suffering a serious problem with my husband, because he treated my mother very badly when she came to visit us (because of an argument that took place between my mother-in-law and my mother); in the end my husband virtually threw my mother out. As a result of that, I had to leave the house with my mother, against my husband’s wishes as he wanted me to stay with him. Please note that I used to live in another country and I traveled with my mother to our country. My husband treats me very well, but I got angry when he treated her in this manner. He regretted it the next day, but she will not forgive him. Is what I did correct, or did I fail to obey my husband as enjoined by Allaah, may He be exalted and glorified?. Answer Praise be to Allaah. Firstly: The husband should uphold ties with his wife’s family and treat them well. This is part of treating his wi...

Question If a husband has sex with his wife every four (on a constant basis) months but it does not fulfill the woman's sexual needs, then is there any Islamic recourse that a woman can take concerning this matter? Is it fair that a man can have sex with his wife everyday but the wife can only have sex every four months with her husband? (after all it is not like she can marry another man to satisfy her needs, but her husband has ample room to satisfy his needs). Answer Praise be to Allah.  This action is undoubtedly wrong, and it is contrary to good treatment of one's wife. Allah says (interpretation of the meaning): “and live with them honourably” [al-Nisa 4:19] “And they (women) have rights (over their husbands as regards living expenses) similar (to those of their husbands) over them (as regards obedience and respect) to what is reasonable” [al-Baqarah 2:228] And the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: “The best of you are those w...

Question What is the reward, "ajr", for the first wife having patience ,"sabr", when her husband takes a second wife? Is there a special reward in this case, or is it the same reward for all women who obey their husbands and make their religious duties? If I would get to know about a special reward, things would be easier to accept. Someone said that the reward for this kind of woman was more than the reward for a mu´min leaving for jihad. And since Hajj is the jihad of a woman, accepting polygamy for the first wife is more than jihad. Is ther daleel for this, or do you know about another reward?. Answer Praise be to Allaah. Firstly: We do not know of any saheeh evidence which refers to the reward mentioned, but al-Tabaraani narrated from Ibn Mas’ood that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Allaah has decreed jealousy for women and jihad for men, so whoever bears that with patience out of faith and in the hope of reward will h...

Question I am the second wife and i ended up in a fight with my husband last week . I wonder what Islam says about that my husband is from my home for a week, 7 days. tomorrow has it been 7 days and he'll come to me. usually I have one day and my co-wife have the other day and so on. but after that we fought did he decide to skip my days, and he was with the first wife in her home. Ended up in a discussion with my husband . He got the idea that I had said that I would sleep with the sisters , but when I said Wallahi I have not said so , he was still beliving that I had said so . it was my night and I was very angry because he did'nt belive me when i told him that i din't say so . He was so strong in his decisions that I really had said that I wanted to sleep with the sisters . But Wallahi Allah is my witness and i din't say so. had not met my husband at the weekend so they is no chance that i would sleep with a sister on my day. I missed him !. what doe...

Question Does Islam state that a man and a women who are married have to love one another? If so how is that possible if the man marries more than one wife? Answer Praise be to Allah Firstly: Love between the husband and the wife is something natural. It cannot be said concerning such a thing that it is obligatory according to sharee‘ah, or that Islam enjoins it; rather in such matters, what could be attained naturally is sufficient and there is no need for a religious text to enjoin it. The one who imagines that married life nothing but a romantic novel or rosy dream is looking for something that cannot exist in real life, as real life inherently involves toil, hardship and difficulty. Allah, may He be exalted, says (interpretation of the meaning): “We have certainly created man into hardship” [al-Balad 90:4]. The poet said: Life is inherently difficult and tough, yet you want it to be free from all problems and troubles; the one who expects from life the opp...